Halloween is traditionally a holiday for children. You put on your cheaply-made, overpriced costume, and walk your neighborhood full of strangers in hopes of free candy. Adults usually have three choices when it comes to the holiday, stay at home to hand out candy, party, or take your kids out trick-or-treating. But what if adults were able to go door to door for treats that appealed to them? What kind of goodies would you be reeling to get home to? What hoard of useful adult items would you spill out of your pillow case at the end of the night? I have a few ideas…
Batteries (The Tootsie Rolls)
Batteries are expensive, easy to lose, are never at the right size you need, and always absent at the moment you need them. A good trail mix of different watts and sizes would be the perfect bag stuffer for the occasional remote controller change.
Toilet Paper: The Good Kind (Hubba Bubba Bubble Tape)
There’s nothing worse than being on the toilet mid-business only to find that you are out of toilet paper. Or worse, you only have one roll that you couldn’t bring yourself to toss that has the consistency of sand paper. A good roll of Angel soft comes through in a pinch. (Bonus: check out the TP Tower for a way to store it!)
Pain Meds (The Milk Duds)
When you’re an adult, things just start to ache more. Headaches, muscle cramps, or just the occasional random pain when your body just isn’t “feeling it” is another annoyance us older residents on Earth have to endure. Not only are good name-brand pain reliever medications expensive, but they are a god-send in times of physical despair.
Alcohol Minis (The Snickers)
Speaking of destroying your liver, alcohol always cures ails of a person with responsibility and stress – so EVERY adult who has ever lived! Small bottles take the edge off on the go (just make sure you’re not driving!) or when absolutely necessary where discretion is key – like a child’s birthday party, for instance. I mean, who wants to remember that?
Babysitter’s Numbers (The Three Musketeers)
Just imagine it – a rolled up piece of paper with printed names and numbers of trusted individuals who are available any time or day, and at a moment’s notice. Bonus if it’s a coupon for a free sit. Hey, I didn’t say it was realistic….
Just a Moment of Peace and Quiet (The Kit Kat “gimmie a break”)
Nothing in your bag, you are just led to a quiet shed that is sound proofed with a chair. You sit in peace and quiet for a full minute until the next person. No trick, just a sweet, sweet treat. After all, what is more precious gift than your time and sanity?
Just Money (The Reese’s Cups)
Just money. Honestly, it’s what every adult wants more of to make their life less stressful. Money certainly does not buy love or happiness, but I think we can all agree that it makes it much easier.
What would you like in your bag if you could trick-or-treat? Comment below, I’m curious!
